I actually started waving my arms around and stomped my foot before literally flouncing away to rage-clean my house. In the first few weeks of being married, my partner did something that infuriated me. I’ve always been a little bit what my mother describes as “sassy.” And, I am one of those people that when I am pissed it always seems to communicate the way she describes. She uses the word saucy throughout this chapter, and, once again, I find myself identifying with what she’s describing. Her ridiculous exaggeration of manner makes him suddenly want to laugh makes him feel, in contrast, stronger, more sensible, and more of a man. This is much the same feeling a woman inspires in a man when she expresses anger in a childlike way. Ī scene such as this invariably makes us smile with amusement. She gets adorably angry at herself because her efforts to respond are impotent. Instead, she stamps he foot and shakes her curls and pouts. when such a child is teased, she doesn’t respond with some hideous sarcasm. Her first chapter on childlikeness covers how women are supposed to model how little girls get angry.Ĭhildlike anger is the cute, pert, saucy anger of a little child. How being like a child helps you avoid being a person that can be easily overruled is beyond me, but let’s see where she goes with it. Helen starts out with a brief introduction, claiming that cultivating “childlikeness” will make your marriage fun, balance out the “angelic qualities” so you don’t become “cloysome,” and, somehow, childlikeness is supposed to make sure we don’t become a doormat. There’s a reason why “virgin” has also traditionally meant “young girl.” Our culture values girlishness, childlikeness, and youthfulness in our personalities, our character, our behavior. But it’s more than just our physical appearance, or our age. Women are infantalized in a million ways every day, and we idolize youthful women. However, in the last two years since I picked this book up again, I’ve been doing a lot of reading, and one of the things I’ve found is that “childlikeness” is a trait American culture values in women. I had no idea where Helen could be going with that– telling women that they need to be “childlike” just seems. You may have noticed a while back on Helen’s chart that one of the “Human Qualities” that every “fascinating woman” should have is “childlikeness.” The first time I saw that particular item, I about gagged.
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